


The Amazing Amnesiacs Attempt Cooking Class or Arson

by nonky



Series: The Amazing Amnesiacs of New York [7]
Category: Blindspot (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-15
Updated: 2017-03-15
Packaged: 2018-10-05 13:40:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10309346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nonky/pseuds/nonky
Summary: Kurt was picturing a cartoon explosion, complete with cartoon Roman, Jane and himself having to put out fires in their eyebrows. And he was wracking his brain to recall if the safe house had a fire extinguisher.





	

"Jane, what is that?" Weller sat up at his desk and called out the open doorway. 

She stepped inside, holding a paper-wrapped sandwich, chewing with one hand over her mouth. "I think it's called a Mcmuffin something," she said innocently. 

Kurt Weller's head tipped back and he pinched his nose shut. His head hurt. He had problems, real, massive problems and he knew he was going to obsess over Jane's inevitable bellyache later in the morning instead of working on all of those problems. He looked at her, and her wide eyes made it clear she understood his exasperation.

"I suppose that's your breakfast," he said sternly. 

"I wanted to pick up something quick so I could drop some off to Roman before I started work," she said.

It was very touching how she looked after her brother. Weller was moved by her devotion, not that he'd expected less of her, though fast food takeout two meals a day was approaching nothing when calories and fat were measured against the nutrition. 

"He doesn't like the food very much," Jane said quietly. "I know this stuff isn't the healthiest, but at least he'll eat something of it."

Kurt was on his feet, tempted to relieve her of her breakfast of death and cholesterol and take both of them out for an actual meal. He knew he couldn't, so he aimed for the next possible solution. 

"I want to give you some cooking lessons. I'll teach you the basics and get you a cookbook that lets you expand into some variations on flavours and ingredients. We'll spring Roman for the night and make it a party," he said, trying to sound positive. 

He suspected if Remi had done any amount of cooking, Jane would have recalled enough to become curious to try it by now. Roman didn't have access to a kitchen, so he might be the only hope of the two of them having a functional cook in the family.

"I guess so, but I'm not very good at it," she warned. "I don't remember it, but I believe that might be a lifelong ignorance of preparing food. You remember I went from school to the service and then back to Shepherd's troops. I think I might have been dining at cafeterias for every meal."

"Anything is better than the heartburn by association I'm getting now," Weller told her. He cringed away from the food but stood close to her. "And we'll go grocery shopping for your house so you can start packing some home-cooked lunches. It would be nice to be able to make things you like without having to go out all the time, right?"

When she arrived home too late to order food, Jane was used to going to bed hungry. She didn't think that would brighten his day, so she smiled and faked enthusiasm. 

"I put foil in the microwave more than once at the safe house," she said. "I get the idea of cooking and it sounds like a worthwhile skill. I just don't want you to expect I'll have this breaking insight and be able to cook."

He nodded, bracing for a lot of explaining and some use of his fire extinguisher. "I got Sawyer through scrambled eggs and bacon for Sarah on Mother's Day last year with my kitchen still standing," he said. "And the egg wiped off the ceiling fan easier than you'd think."

She was wary, but willing to try. It would be a night out of his cell for her brother, if nothing else was accomplished.

 

"FIRE! Oh, god, I didn't think the oil would spread like that," Jane shouted. 

Roman reacted with his usual speed, slapping a pot lid down on the smoking skillet and shouldering her away from the stovetop. Kurt had been gone for a moment to the bathroom, and come back to find Jane's adding the chopped onions to the pan had nearly scuttled his overhanging cabinets. 

"Everybody okay," he asked, trying to hide his panic. 

"I threw the oil in," she said. "And it must have been too forceful with the onions because everything splashed and it started to burn."

"Who's got the oven mitt," Kurt asked. "Roman get that off the burner, please? Anyone get hurt?"

"No, we're fine," the younger man said seriously. He moved the skillet and opened it cautiously. "It was a flare up, oil splashed over and the burner was up too high. Medium for our skillet, high for the soup to let it boil. Bigger pot goes to higher temperature until we take it down to a simmer."

The multiple dishes seemed to confuse Jane, who may well have been a first time cook somehow. Roman was confident and nodded frequently, holding in his mind the details of dishes a few steps ahead. It was obvious he was remembering things as the lesson went along.

"Okay, no big deal. Check the soup and give it a stir, but remember the pot is fairly full," Weller said. "Do things slowly and gradually and don't get burned. Television chefs do a bunch of dramatic gestures and show off moves, and we're just trying to make dinner."

Jane made a face as she opened the soup pot, gave it a stir and gently laid the lid back. Roman had the skillet back on the burner, and was assessing the onion. It was a bit more caramelized than it should be, but not too far gone. 

"This is probably ready for the ground beef," he said correctly. 

Kurt nodded, happy to let him lead the way. "Should be fine. So, Jane, with the soup you're going by smell, but also time. We want to see it boil, then reduce heat to medium. Remember, the chicken in that was pre-cooked, the noodles don't take that long and we had the vegetables and broth in there for a while. At this point, we want to keep it hot, remembering to stir and let it simmer maybe twenty minutes more."

She nodded, but the recipe was going to have to be a written list for her to follow. Roman was much more natural. He had the ground beef out of the package without an issue, and was mashing it to get it cooking more evenly. 

"Yuck," she commented, wrinkling her nose at the raw meat. 

"I take it you're not a fan of chili," Kurt asked, smiling. 

She shrugged. "I've never had it. I'll usually eat anything, but I don't like looking at it before then."

"This is a good way to get a large batch for putting away for later. You can put together a basic chili recipe in a big pot, heating it through more or less like the soup, and on the other burner you cook your beef to add at the end. It also allows for making some vegetarian chili at the same time as you do a full-strength meat batch. Just portion some of the basic chili before the meat is added."

Roman was almost done with the ground beef, getting it finely chopped with the edge of a spatula and showing a good sense of when it needed to be flipped around and stirred. 

Kurt nodded to Jane. "Your pot with the soup is ready to simmer by now. Turn it back, should say simmer right on the knob, and give one final long stir. Then you can leave it mostly alone," he told her. 

He laid out a cutting board and knife across the kitchen. Jane could chop vegetables without supervision. Without a hot cooktop, he trusted her completely. She was better with a knife than anyone he knew. 

"Soup is going to continue to simmer itself. Check on it if you feel it's necessary, but it's going to be low maintenance unless it gets turned up too high," he said. "If you want to chop our lettuce, tomatoes and peppers for the tacos, I'll get Roman what he needs to add seasonings."

Presented with a knife and an excuse to be away from the meat, Jane took her beer and sipped away as she chopped. Kurt only had to look over a few times, and was never really in fear for her fingers. 

Roman had the two pots going well, easily adjusting the knob on the skillet lower once he saw the meat was cooked. Kurt poured a small amount of olive oil in a bowl and handed over the lazy susan spice caddy. 

"I have a taco seasoning all in one, but this is where you can get creative," he said. "I wouldn't suggest using just anything, but you never know. Adding a bit at a time lets you fix errors, too. A bit of accidental cinnamon in a taco is easily overlooked if you add more chili powder. Keep in mind the people you're feeding might not enjoy too much heat."

Jane had finished her beer and her vegetable chopping. She wandered over and sniffed at a few spices, getting her brother to do the same. Eventually, they had agreed upon the taco seasoning, paprika and extra dried chili flakes. It was unsurprising the siblings liked spicy foods. 

"Whisking your spices into the oil mixes the flavour more evenly," Kurt said. "And it keeps the meat from going too dry. Lean meat is good, but it needs to survive a reheating in order to be worth making this much. Jane, what else do we need for tacos?"

She looked at him blankly. "Uhm, tortillas?"

"And shredded cheese," he said. "You can make your own salsa and guacamole, but I'm not that ambitious. Tortillas are pre-made tonight but you get to exercise your kitchen talents by shredding cheese."

Jane smiled at him, arching an eyebrow. "You're just worried I'm going to try to help with the stove again. Are you going to put an 'out of order' sign on the safe house stove?"

He was more than worried. The tortillas were going in the oven for a few minutes to heat up without going soggy, and Kurt did not want Jane anywhere near that process. It was literally a matter of parchment paper and a little heat. He was picturing a cartoon explosion, complete with cartoon Roman, Jane and himself having to put out fires in their eyebrows. And he was wracking his brain to recall if the safe house had a fire extinguisher.

"One thing about cooking is it's a creative type thing, and you won't be talented at every part of it, maybe," he said gently. "I can't bake. It all burns to a crisp. I don't know if it's the longer time in the oven or that it's out of sight and I forget about it. The skills should be transferable but are not. You are a really great veggie chopper and I think you'll do great with the cheese grater. That means between the two of you, I have successfully made one cook tonight."

Roman looked over his shoulder, smugly having added the oil and spices to the meat and stirring the pot of soup with an ease that made Jane scowl. 

"We haven't actually made any food ready to eat yet," she grumbled.

"And we're very close to eating, but we need shredded cheese or it's not going to be nearly as delicious," Kurt said. 

"Don't think I don't know you're patronizing me," she warned, but turned to find one jar of salsa, a container of fresh guacamole and a block of cheddar in the fridge.

Obviously just showing off, Roman turned on the broiler and opened a package of tortillas onto a plate. He folded them in a sheet of parchment and popped it in without ever losing track of his stovetop.

Jane winked at Weller and set herself to shredding. If she only earned one job in the kitchen, she was going to do it extremely well. It was nice Roman was the one excelling at all this. She hadn't thought she'd like cooking and that was pretty accurate. 

She could be the beer drinking dinner supervisor, Jane decided. No need to take away the satisfaction Roman and Weller felt over their pot of soup and skillet of taco filling.

It was just so cute to see Weller complimenting Roman's technique and fussing over his soup pot like a cooking show designed just to her tastes. Now she had to get them making her something with chocolate. 

She squinted at her brother, wondering if she could will herself to remember if he could bake, too. Just in case, she should probably insist it be a second cooking class at Kurt's house. She didn't want her safe house burning down and she hated kitchen cleaning worst than cooking. 

It would be unkind to ruin Kurt's fun.


End file.
